Reason #43 to Monitor Your Impressionable Child's TV Viewing

Colsen: Daddy, I want to be a Power Puff Girl!

Trying to Sleep

When you have a kid, sometimes you're just trying to sleep in bed when that hallway light starts flashing. On. Off. On. Off. On. Off. You swear you had closed the bedroom door, but doors have a mysterious tendency to open and close themselves these days. So there's the hallway light... shining in your face... on... off... on....

LOL!

Way more fun than your dog chasing a flashlight.

Brooklyn's Playground

The other day I took Colsen to Brooklyn's Playground. This is quite the wonderland of fun and surprises. If you haven't been, I do recommend. And it's probably the busiest playground I've ever been to. It looked like the elementary school at recess. Colsen had a great time though. It's unfortunate that colder weather is on the horizon. But next spring and summer are looking action packed.

Monster Trucks!

Last month we took Colsen to see the monster trucks in Blackfoot. And unlike during the race track debacle, I came prepared with some ear muffs. Thanks to this wonderful invention, we were able to enjoy the entire show. I watched as other parents carried their crying children out, holding their ears as they screamed. Ha. That wasn't me this time.

Um, What's Wrong with This Computer?

We recently bought a touch screen computer to replace our old desk top. This has been great because now Colsen can explore the interwebs on his own. I made him some bookmarks for Super Why and Caillou.

My concern though is that when he encounters computers outside of our home he's not going to know how to use them. He's just going to sit there tapping on the screen and asking, "Daddy, what's a mouse? "

Cereal Killer

Colsen felt it was necessary to line up all his little cereal boxes on the tv stand. Why put them in the kitchen? That's not convenient. Anybody want to guess how much cereal ended up all over the floor?

Lightning McGoCart

The other day Colsen and I went out to Atomic City for the Saturday races. He was pretty excited at first while watching the go-carts. But when the stock cars came out it was a little too loud for him. He had to cover his ears and then he started to cry. Needless to say, we spent more time driving our car to the race track than we did watching cars at the race track. Oh well. Maybe next year.

Mr Grumps

One thing you must never do if you you want to keep your sanity is interrupt your child's sleep. I just woke Colsen up from a nap and his first reaction was to skank me out. I think he was contemplating punching me in the face. This was followed by some crying and running around hysterically. When he finally came to the realization that I was not going to resume sleep on came the permanent pouty face. Now he's just sitting quietly refusing to answer any questions or participate in any interactions, but looking as though he is plotting some revenge... perhaps an all out scream-fest. Just a volcano ready to blow.

Shhh!

Restaurants that ban young children have been getting quite a bit of play on the news lately. Before Colsen was born I always said I wouldn't be that parent... you know, the one that let's their child run amok in public. That was then though. Now I just wonder why other people don't have the great tuning out abilities that I have developed. One great solution to this problem has been the smart phone. Colsen starts crying and we just bust out the Angry Birds or kids' videos on YouTube. It has this amazing calming/hypnotic effect. Woot. Problem solved.

Future Baseball Star

The other day we went to the festival for Brooklyn's Playground. Colsen wanted to do the dunk tank. He hit the target on his fourth try. It wasn't hard enough to depress the target, but he got some assistance from the game host. Most importantly, it was probably the most fun he had. Apparently, it's quite amusing to watch a guy fall in the water. And maybe we have a future baseball star on our hands!

Sacramento Zoo

After spending 4 hours at the zoo looking at many different animals, riding a carousel, and eating great food:

Me: Colsen, what did you do at the zoo today?
Colsen: I got a truck.

Glad to see the gift shop was the most memorable part of the day.

Party Time!

Colsen attended a friend's 4th birthday party today. This involved playing video games, eating too many sweets, and in general wreaking havoc in a confined space. Kids' birthday parties are so hectic and loud. Why do adults even tell children that it's their birthday? Just don't even tell them until they are old enough to ask about it. Then tell them you can't remember the exact day. And it would be dangerous to celebrate a birthday on the wrong day because then the birthday trolls will come around and eat all your shoes and toys... and pull your hair... and make it smell really bad in here.

Potty Time?

As I'm returning to Colsen after discarding a diaper...

Colsen: "I pee pee again." Pointing to diaper. "See, it's hot."

4th of July

We can add fireworks to the list of things Colsen is afraid of. He hid inside during the fireworks show.

Summertime!

Summer is finally here and the weather is even cooperating. Fun for Colsen as he gets to run free.

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Bubble Bath

Colsen really loves to take bubble baths. He gets pretty excited when the tub starts filling up. But the weird thing is that when he actually gets in he complains about the bubbles being on him. He holds out his arms and asks me to wipe them with a washcloth. We do this several times until the tub starts running out of bubbles. Then he starts to whine because he's running out of bubbles. It never ends with this guy. I'm pretty sure it's all a ruse to assert his dominance over me. Needs to know that he still has the upper hand in this relationship. Yes, Colsen. Anything you want.

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Child + Unattended Makeup Bag =

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Fun Dip

When we went to Elko during Colsen's birthday weekend, Colsen discovered the joy of Fun Dip. Thank you Willy Wonka for this confectionary wonder. What better way to pass the time in a hotel room than to eat sugar with a stick made of sugar?

I was actually quite impressed with Colsen's adeptness at being able to dip the stick so easily into the sugar packet for consumption. Should this actually be a concern rather than a point of familial pride? I hate being so happy about things that later on become a regret. I'm just going to confuse the little guy.

Making Cookies

One of my all time favorite family traditions is making cookies. I mostly did this with my grandma when I was younger. My dad never seemed to mind when it was cookie time either as he was the beneficiary. So I guess the ultimate goal is to teach Colsen to make me cookies when I have a craving for them.

Colsen likes to help me with everything in the kitchen, from pouring spices on stuff to putting the dishes away. So the other day I decided to try making cookies with him. I mean, come on, he's 2 now. He should have a firm grasp on baking by now.

He of course wanted to stir all the ingredients.

One of his favorite things to do when we're in the kitchen is cracking eggs. Actually, it's more smashing the eggs than cracking them, but I have gotten really good at picking shell parts out of the yolks.

At one point we had to stop for a break to eat brown sugar. It is mighty tasty. In fact he would have been satisfied just with that.

After slightly burning the first batch, they turned out all right. Colsen certainly enjoyed them.

He also very much enjoyed feeding them to Cookie Monster.

Cousin Amy, if you're out there reading this, I think we're ready to tackle some Christmas sugar cookies. You know, if your mom will let us use the sprinkles.

Aquarium

We had a chance the other day while we were in Salt Lake to visit the aquarium. It's quite impressive the number of sea creatures that are bigger than Colsen. The featured exhibit were penguins. He enjoyed those. I haven't decided yet who enjoys these trips more, me or him.

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Say Cheese

Kids are so cute at this age. Unfortunately, they don't understand the concept of standing still, looking at the camera, and smiling for a picture. For every good picture I take, I have at least three others of the top or side of Colsen's head as he looks this way or that. I'm impressed when professional photographers make it look so easy with their bells and squeaky toys. It's harder for them to get a good picture of the parents than the child who in between takes is crying, yelling, and/or wiggling. Here's to you professional child photographer.

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1, 2, 3, 4....

Colsen finds it necessary to count before going down the slide. He's just not very consistent as far as what he's going to count to. He counted to a different number everytime. I was able to take this picture because fortunately he was counting to ten before sliding down. Prior to that he only counted to four. Odd.

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Sunny Day, Sweeping the Clouds Away

Today was warm enough that we were able to have family day at the park. Good times. Can't wait for some consistently good weather so that we can do this more often. Way better than watching PBS Sprout all afternoon.

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At the Movies

Colsen and I went to watch Tangled the other day. With all these Disney movies we've been watching, I've decided to tell him that it is normal to break out in song during random mundane events of the day. Life is like a cartoon musical. If it's in the movies, it has to be true.

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My Little Dress Up Buddy

One of the best parts of having a child is that you get to dress them up however you want. I like to dress Colsen up in stuff that I wore as a kid... hence the Superman shirt. He like a Mini-Me. But I also like to dress him up in clothes that match mine currently. So obviously, when I bought him that Superman shirt, I also bought myself one. How fun am I?

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Mommy Daddy Banana Wiggles

Colsen says a lot of words these days. He will repeat anything you say or anything he hears on tv. His pronunciation isn't the best though and I'm often left wondering what the heck he is trying to tell me. Today I was wondering if he was saying anything at all or just spouting out random words. I decided it was the latter, but then he got upset and repeated the same words. Obviously it all made perfect sense to him. But alas I was quite lost. That's when I decided to give him a banana and called it good.

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Sick Kid + Dog =

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Feeling Sick

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My Parents Went to Vegas and All They Got Me was this Elmo Shirt

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Playing Outside

I would have preferred sitting around the house all day doing nothing, but I guess you have to set a good example and not let your kid waste his life like you do yours.

I like this pic. Reminds me of a close up in an action movie where the hero is watching the bad guy get away with the girl all the while formulating a plan to get her back.

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Passed Out

The Super Bowl wore Colsen out. And he didn't even pay any attention to it. He was glad the Steelers lost though.

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Our Night

Colsen and I decided to go out for some Mickey D's tonight. It had been a long week and we wanted to treat ourselves.

Things were going great at first. A satisfying dinner.

But then Colsen started getting a little crazy. He was getting McNugget drunk, popping them in left and right. He couldn't get enough. Pretty soon he was double fisting it.

Things got pretty crazy. Who knows what really goes into that processed meat, right? Colsen insisted that he drive us home.

I tried to talk him out of it. He wanted to prove his sobriety and walked a straight line while saying his ABC's backwards, so I thought, what the heck, he seems ok. I was wrong. He didn't take us home. He took us to Wal-Mart. And when we got there, he went straight to the chicken nugget aisle. He got a taste and now he was feening.

From there, he demanded we check out the toy aisle.

He became delusional. He insisted that he was a great musician. He talked about how he and some buds almost started a band back in the day.


We passed by the bicycles and he wanted to show off.

I couldn't stand it. He was attempting wheelies and tried to jump over other toys. I was concerned for his safety. I forced him to wear a helmet. He didn't like that at all.

In a fit of rage, he drove his bicycle into a pile of Pillow Pets and passed out. I took that as my opportunity to carry him out and bring him home. He's still completely unconscious.

He's going to wake up with one heck of a McHangover.

Elmo Undies and Shoes

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The Potty is for Reaching the Sink

He knows what goes in the potty. It's just a matter of getting it in there.

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